Is the key to a man’s heart through his stomach?
“The key to a man’s heart is through his stomach.”
Whoever dished out that advice needs to think twice before attempting to bag a husband.
Is his mouth wide open, while his heart remains clamped shut? If so, you might as well follow the food on its way out the other end.
For those of you who haven’t seen the movie The Joy Luck Club, it may strike a chord with you. The movie comprises of interconnecting vignettes featuring three generations of women, with cinematography and music guaranteed to pull at your heart strings and lead to uncontrollable sobbing. Four mothers and their daughters unravel tales of love and loss from past to present. I highly recommend this as a movie to watch with friends, mothers, daughters, and significant others*.
*Warning: May lead to break-ups for relationships on unsteady ground
One story that really stood out for me was the one featuring Rose and her relationship with Ted, a wealthy physician. It begins with a flashback of them in college, Rose is sassy and quick to put Ted in his place. Desperate to fit in with high society and western culture, she somehow transforms into a submissive wife, which ultimately leads to the demise of their marriage. When Ted asks for a divorce, what does she do? She decides to bake him his favourite dessert, a chocolate peanut butter pie. Thankfully, her mother talks some sense into her:
An Mei: What you going to do with leftovers after he eat one slice?
Rose: Throw it away I guess.
An Mei: You ask yourself why you make this. Because I know even if you don’t.
Rose: I like being tragic, ma. I learned it from you.
An Mei: You think he sees this pie, now he so sorry take you for granted? You think this? You the foolish one. Every time you give him gift, like begging. Take this. I’m sorry. Please forgive me. I’m not worth as much as you. So he only take you more for granted. You’re just like my mother. Never know what you’re worth.
Instead of dangling his favourite dessert, Rose refuses to let Ted walk all over her by boldly staking her claims. The final scene (set in pouring rain), where she strikes up the courage to tell him off, is nothing short of epic.
Know your worth.
I once dated a guy who was very opinionated. Over time, I realized I became less outspoken and more eager to please him. When we watched JLC together one night, it was a catalyst for our break up. I woke up in the morning staring at the family size jar of Nutella and browning bananas I bought a while back ago. He once told me he’d worship me if I could whip up the perfect batch of crepes (with said ingredients). I was hoping to woo him over to my place for a change. Say what?
I don’t even like Nutella.
Ladies, even if you’re able to work the kitchen by cooking meals that can dazzle any man into a food comatose, you may not get the respect you deserve in the long run. He’s either into you, or not. Know the signs. Is he taking you for granted? Are you always having to please him instead of the other way around? Who calls the shots? Unless he’s willing to reciprocate in some shape or form, don’t be a bib. However, if he’s into you, being a cooking Goddess will likely leave him panting for more, in or out of the kitchen.